Skip to main content

A letter to my imaginary friend

I know you don't like my writing, however after not speaking to each other for a while it became impossible to pick up the phone or to drop by. Especially in the way we parted. I fear your anger and rejection of my white flag. So I'd like to ask you to just ignore my writing and only read what I have to say.

Yes, I feel responsible for most of the things that have gone wrong. I must be the only person on this planet that manages to even screw up with his imaginary friend. We said some horrible things to each other last time we spoke. Of course I assumed that you, being my imaginary friend, would understand every word and all sub context. It seems that I was wrong, I've never felt as misunderstood by someone in my life before. I'm not passing blame, it's unreasonable to long from anyone to completely understand you.

We do have some crazy memories don't we? Remember when we were trying the difference in taste of that home brewed vodka I had standing in the cupboard? I Actually can't remember half of it, what I do remember is waking up cold without out any pj's on, a sore behind and that silly happy smile on your face. I know I shouldn't have ignored you like that for those weeks, I'm sure we were two consenting adults. (Hopefully you're not still sharing a mailbox with your neighbors. I'd like to keep this between you and me).

You know, I've learned that in some cases you fight the most with the people you care about. It sort of makes sense, why would you care what someone thinks of you when you don't care about them. You need to persuade them why you did what you did in order for them to understand.

Okay I understood that me canceling for your birthday party last ehm - well I seem to have forgotten when your birthday was. In any case, I understand that canceling 15 minutes in advance of a planned out activity wasn't the nicest thing to do. However shouting at me that I'm selfish and saying to me that, "I don't want to hear what your excuse is because canceling is inexcusable!", ironically sounded rather selfish to me. What if I was calling from the hospital to tell you that I was bitten by a rabies infested one eyed dog and they had to amputate my leg? That sounds like a pretty good excuse to cancel. I think that's even a good reason to not show without a word! Come to think of it you should be happy your birthday was so important to me that I called to cancel. But that's okay I forgive you. You see how a little kindness can come a long way?

Anyway, yes I know I'm unreliable as hell. I don't pick up my phone half of the time, the best thing you get out of me on an invitation is, "maybe", my convictions change as much as the seasons and I'll stick with pessimism until life proofs me wrong.  There's absolutely no reason any imaginary friend would accept the reality of me!
But I've known times where standing out on the deck on a night in springtime, was it Thursday maybe, was perfection. Life took on a different meaning. No longer was it this big long thing with a clear beginning and ending. It became ever changing morphing from moment to moment. And all the rest? All the things that seemed so important and in need of understanding? They simply ceased to exist.

Anyway, I vote to let bygones be bygones! You were wrong I was right, it doesn't matter. In the end you need me to exist.

Popular posts from this blog

Failed gamer review of Resident Evil 7 Biohazard

My review as a failed gamer of Resident Evil 7 Biohazard (isn't that two words?!).
Started up the game with a pounding heart. Entered the first area, darkroom flashlight lit only. Ambiance: grany died a horrific death by a rabie infested shih-tzu many moons ago, the kids never helped her with the household.

Making a 360 in the room had my heart pounding...

After 5 minutes I sprinted to the exit, clicked the action button to open the door and ran back. The door only opened a crack. Gave myself a pep talk and with one eye closed ran against the half open door into the hallway, crapped my pants and switched of the computer.

Ambiance: 10/10
Graphics: 10/10
Play-ability: 0/10
Story: Way to freaking scary 馃槰

GAD and Sexy

So I’ve been thinking about writing a meaningful flashback/review of my vacation in 艢winouj艣cie Poland. One of the strangest places, I visited in Poland and then not strange in a good way, but more strange in a somewhat boring-jaw-dropping-creepy way. I decided I would try to be all nice and objective and writer like, make sense in what would be my traveler voice (never mind that I would totally love to be a traveler and a man of the world but I’m so not). But then I thought since we’re all sharing our social lives on “the internet” and some people can barely fart without tweeting about it, I might as well throw it all overboard and just write in my own voice, be completely honest, really just confess to the world how completely disturbed I am. Come to think of it, I’d really only confess to people that have an interested in what’s going on in my head or life so I figure about one or two people will make it to the end of what I’m writing now.
Since this post was going to be about my…

Fast service Zakopane - Krak贸w

46 degrees in the sun the thermometer read when leaving the hotel room. Together with our friends my wife and I handed in our room keys. Dragging our suitcases we started our 30 minute walk to the train station.

Zakopane station lacks nothing but offers nothing extra. The platforms are accessible from just about anywhere but tickets can only be bought from the main station building which has the classic station look.
When entering the main hall it becomes obvious that time has stood still at PKP, the national railway company of Poland. Nothing has changed much over the last 40 odd years in this station. We buy our tickets from a woman nearing her pension age, although very friendly she is slow and a queue builds up quickly. With 35 minutes to spare we were the proud owners of 4 first class train tickets on the fast service to Krak贸w.

As we made our way through the station we decided to stock-up on drinks and food for our 3 and a half hour journey. At the platform entrance there’s a sm…